Hoopty Vs. High-end..Dream on Relationships

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I just recently had a dream about various kinds of men that woman pick, entertain, bump into, or simply accidentally become trapped with,  in different situations and scenarios that they never saw coming. Let’s Face it, its 2017 and telling the Average Christian Woman that Boaz is coming after she’s been single for 10 years isn’t exciting or the least bit believable for many. In fact, many women tend to believe that there simply is “something wrong with them, or something they’re not doing right”…

Many Christian woman are told to Embrace their singleness, and Get busy for God, and join Groups and spend hours with the Lord to get rid of the “fleshly” desires of a man, some even consider it a sin for a woman to confess their craving for the male touch, the fantasy of Boaz is deemed “inappropriate to many “Christians in the church”, but what is this really all about? If God created Sex, Marriage, Love and said it was good for man not to be Alone” Genesis 2:18, where do these Religious and hypocritical opinions come from?

To a certain degree for many women whether Christian or not Dating Relationships have the tendency to end up in Short term sexual relationships, or even long-term sexual Relationships that don’t always lead to marriage. If marriage is the only Relationship appropriate for sex according to biblical principles “The marriage bed is undefiled, but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge”, you don’t see any standards, respect, or emphasis being put on it today at all. So, let’s examine the real problems today that lead woman to the Hoopty Relationships (Broken & fragmented dating with individuals that are not fit for lifetime)

#1 Lack of Relationship with God, a prayer life, and focus on Ministry. 2. Using Gifts to do Kingdom work or kingdom business. Many women today struggle with how to get their God given assignments, dreams, and talents off the ground. This could be for several reasons including not spending enough time with God. “Hebrews 11:6 states that “For he that cometh to God, must believe that he is and “he is a rewarder to them that diligently seek him” There are so many  aspects to developing a relationship with God that needs to be mentioned, starting with “seeking him”, speaking to him, or praying, worshipping God, and even letting him Reveal things to you as an individual. All components our vital for a proper balance.

#2 Continually Filling Voids with Men in times of Loneliness when u should be working on “SELF”

Let’s face it, every person needs time in their life to grow, heal, and develop the things needed to make their life flourish. If you have a gift of singing, owning an online clothing business, or starting a ministry, etc your dedication and time needed to get those goals and accomplishments met, can easily be distracted by spending countless hours entertaining men that are not helping you grow or go to your next level in life. Satan uses men that are not sent by God to Distract you from being all u can be in your time of singleness. Think about the last time you spent so much time and energy fussing, yelling, and complaining with a temporary “boyfriend”. Or what about dealing with the obsessive control freak boyfriend who won’t let u go anywhere, or see your friends or just be you! Then there are the Abusive lovers who hit you, gives u a busted lip or eye and tells you he will kill you over and over. Some woman are even ok with a man laying up in their home, eating, “chilling” and watching Tv, while she is “at work”, working to pay bills, just to say she has “someone”. In these cases of bumping heads with the “HOOPTY” men (men that serve no real value on blossoming in life) a woman can’t help but feel drained and worn out from fighting, pursuing, and pulling against the gut feeling that these aren’t the best choice of partners for their life

  1. #3 The Hoopty men are not built to last, simply they are put in place as a distraction to keep woman from elevating to their next level or opportunities. How many women do we know that has broken up, split up, and made back up with the same men who has not done anything different in the breakups, worthy of being taken back. This is clearly an example of a bad investment, that will continue to drain and suck the life out of the woman. Hooptys’ break down, even after fixing them and taping up the problem. Even after tying up the bumper, repeatedly.  It doesn’t matter how much time and money u put into the broke down hoopty, it continues to ‘BREAK DOWN”

It is time for woman to re-align themselves back to God and re-evaluate the Relationships in their life. There are many of you who are reading this that simply need to let it go. Yes let it go…let “him” go, because this is simply not the will of God for you to be broke down, tired, crying and stressed month after month over a Hoopty man. Let me make something clear, I’m not trying to bash men who clearly are not in a place of treating a woman with worth and value, because we all can relate to making mistakes! But what makes these situations bad is that these men are given the same freedom of choice to better themselves and break cycles and curses like woman. This dream was specifically talking to woman. This also doesn’t mean that there isn’t woman who represent the Hoopty either vs Men from this dream. In many cases their  our woman who do just as much evil and cause the problems in Bad relationships too.

In this dream on June 7, 2017, I personally was driving a beat-up car (HOOPTY) around the local neighborhood. For some reason, I could not get very far in this vehicle, but I seemed to love it and place significant value on it and it was like a prized possession. I wanted to have this Hoopty. This day when the vehicle broke down I saw that I was standing with 2 men of my Past, both ex’s-that I no longer was with.  They were clearly just their and examining the vehicle, but not trying to really help in any kind of way, if anything they were just spectating the whole scenario. Over the course of the next few minutes, A tow truck driver came to see what was going and I explained that the car had broken down. He seemed to be examining the vehicle and he walked around all sides of the car. In my mind, I was keeping my fingers crossed and I was awaiting a quote to fix this car once again for the millionth time. I just needed more “time” to get by in “this” before it was time to think about another or should I say the “other” vehicle. The comment that came out of the towers mouth next was surprising and not what I anticipated. He looked at me and said, ” Well this isn’t going to work, I’m afraid that your engine has blew and your car is on the verge of overheating”. He continued, ” I wouldn’t put another dime into this vehicle. ” I sunk my head down sadly and said “Noooo!”. The mechanic then says, “I know there is something better for you, what about the garage kept car? Why don’t u drive that? Do you want to have, me test that vehicle out? See if it’s any minor maintenance that needs done? I looked at the tow guy and snapped, “there’s “nothing” wrong with that vehicle, its brand new and I’m not able to drive it because its apart of an inheritance settlement that is not quite settled yet! I begin to get angry thinking about how I was still waiting on final paperwork from a family member, and the lawyer for final consent of ownership. It was so many delays and setbacks with the whole thing with that vehicle, that I just got used to driving my hoopty. (Much like ladies think it’s such a long wait for God to send the real man in their lives) (A real man) ……. “Hmmm I see” says the tow guy, “Well if u would like I can gladly take this off your hands for a couple hundred bucks, to fix this will be well over $1000.00, I think it’s time u stop investing in this, it’s not worth it”. I sighed and felt a heaviness and reluctantly handed over the keys, while the tower counted 10 $20 bills and handed it to me. As I watched him mount my vehicle, I was just left there thinking now what? He asked if I needed a ride somewhere, I said no. I just begin to walk not knowing what was next… thinking “God when will I have my promise, this garaged BMW Vision Next 100. It was such an unexpected blessing to find out my great grandfather left it to me before he passed away, but the paperwork was never properly updated and handled. I knew better was waiting on me, but I didn’t know when it would be in my ability to have. (How many of you woman can say that you’ve been presented with an opportunity to meet a better more well-rounded man, but you thought…it’s too much that will come with this!!!!!”) Yep. u know these stories!!

Moral of the story: The Hoopty is the man  meant to keep you hurt, broke, disappointed and barely making it from one season of your life to the next….Just like a hoopty barely can make it from one neighborhood to the next) When u can’t see how you’re going to get that better blessing( Suitable mate Genesis 2:18) it’s so easy to to keep what you have( hoopty…wrong man) instead of waiting on Gods timing for what will really benefit you. (The proper husband, soulmate, partner, etc… a better vehicle that will last, the high end brand new, new blessing) The tow man seemed to know that there was something stored away for later that was more suitable even without needing to tell him about it. The tow man can represent God, he examines our motives and heart behind why we want to keep broken things and people around. God also examines why we want to continue to keep investing in wrong men, Relationships, etc. The tow man offered to take the burden off my hands in the dream (broke down vehicle, no different than he tells woman to give him the burdens of dead weight Relationships with men that mean u no good”) God wants to lift the burden and heaviness and take away people, men, and things that mean woman no good. The inheritance was there in the dream, but the timing and things associated with the blessing was causing delay in it being accessible. Just like in our lives when woman won’t let go of Bad relationships, heal, and seek God, that garage kept blessing continues to just sit there. The man u need, the soulmate, opportunities, etc. will come with getting in alignment with God to receive. I encourage every woman reading this to examine, pray, and even repent to God and ask him in your heart if u don’t know him. Romans 10:9-10, says, “That if thou shall confess with your mouth the lord Jesus and shalt believe in your heart that God hath raised him from the dead you shall be saved” The greatest Relationship that should be formed before any other Relationship is your Relationship with God.  Always know that God has better for you, and like Jeremiah 29:11, He knows the thoughts he thinks for you, thoughts to prosper u and give you an expected end.

Holy Kiss

taishabioRomans 16:16… “16 greet one another with a holy kiss. The Churches of Christ greet you.” NKJV…

I want to speak to all of those who are saving yourself for marriage, practicing celibacy and have a desire to please God in their relationships. As a woman who remained abstinent for 24 years until engaged, broke my virginity and had my first son at 25, I thought that this stand was going to please God so much that it would spill over and bless me and my fiance’s (at that time) relationship!! Well as I begin to pray more, worship and was excited that the man I stood by (while he did 6 years in prison) came home I just knew God was going to bless this union….

Much to my dismay I began to have dreams vividly that I was married my father, yes my father!! (God revealed that it meant I was married to my Father in heaven and wasn’t going to marry my fiance at the time.) I also begin to have dreams that a light skinned female was about to enter into my fiance’s life, whom I was pregnant by at the time. I ignored the warnings of these dreams. Shortly after my fiance at that time (2004) begin to date someone else, became distant and later about halfway through the pregnancy admitted he was involved in someone else’s life he even introduced me and it was the same light skinned female I saw in my dreams!!!

I was hurt I felt like I didn’t want to live anymore. I remember stooping over toilets telling God I wanted to die! I’m saying all this to say make sure your celibacy and stand counts with the right man, because otherwise it won’t make a difference! If your compatible, fall, but used to get your life right with someone God is backing you up with you still will be blessed… In the end, make sure your motive for celibacy are pure not based upon a fairy tale life. If God shows you you’re making a mistake it doesn’t matter how celibate you are, you will not reap the blessings in your relationship!

And for those who say kissing is wrong while dating, courting, or greeting each other etc… There is such a thing as a holy kiss as mentioned in the Bible. Romans 16:6. Sometimes I think the church just wants brownie points and likes to be deep about stuff. For those of you waiting for a fairy tale love story on my end, I can honestly say I will give you the train wreck story. I humbly admit that I’m crawling to the finish line… I don’t operate in lies, my God knows my weaknesses, and he knows my heart. I truly just want us to love, be loved and have healthy relationships, friendships, engagements and marriages… Now that’s Kingdom love!

When God sends a soulmate

taishabioWhen God sends a soulmate and partner into your life, one of the ways you will recognize him is that unlike the others in your past, he actively pursues you, he can’t wait to see you, he feels like he can’t live without you! There is something within YOU that his spirit says he needs!!! When I first started getting to know him it was nice to know that he told me he felt the anointing of GOD ON MY life… he then asked DO I KNOW what that means? I laughed because I thought how cute, the anointing is something that you wish you didn’t know about sometimes! Then he broke it down and said, “Anointing means the divine manifestation of God’s presence in your life.” I don’t feel worthy of that, but I’m humbled. We are very rough around the edges but I’m believing god as we grow stronger and stronger day by day. So ladies as you wait on your Boaz remember he will actively pursue you.. he will recognize something different about you, and he will know instantly that he can’t live without you! THAT’S KINGDOM LOVE